I'm tired. Pretty much all of the time. And if I'm so tired with only one child and one full time job that allows me to have a fairly flexible schedule (I work 7-3:30 so I can pick up Kate from daycare by 4:30 at the latest and most weeks, I can work from home one day a week), I have no idea how I think I can have another child. And yet, we 100% want to have another child and given that we always said we'd like to have kids about 3 years apart, that would mean thinking about getting pregnant again now, or in reality, about 1.5 years ago, considering how not easy it is for us to actually get pregnant...
And I am insanely jealous of my friends who have the option of working part time or even not at all - I'm not even sure if I'd choose that if I had the option, but damn it, I'd like it to be an option. I am also insanely jealous of my friends (and frankly, my brothers too) who have parents who live close by and bring over diapers and clothes and toys for their kids and babysit for free and take them out to dinner. I know in my rational mind that my parents would do that too if we lived near them, but we don't and so in all 100% honesty, I'm jealous. And I'm tired.
And then I wonder, does Kate even notice that Paul and I split our schedules so that she is in daycare the least amount of time possible for having 2 parents who are both working daytime full time jobs or does she really not care and maybe I can stop getting up at 4:15 AM every day to get to the gym before getting to work by 7 AM?
I know this is cranky and whiny, but that's how I feel....
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2 comments:
Hey hon! I hear you!!!! You need to read this book called "Perfect Madness" -- it addresses this exact issue, in the DC area no less. It's an eye-opener.
We need to get together soon. I miss you guys! And the runs. And the girl time. *sigh*
-P
Hello love-
You have every reason to be jealous because, yes, it IS nice to be close to our parents. No, Kate does not know the efforts it takes you and Paul to make her life a perfect one.
However, and I say this as only a friend of over 20 years could say, this blog post is a slight contradiction to the earlier post discussing whether or not to move back to Michigan. It's the forever struggle, isn't it?
Love you all.
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