Halloween Parade at School

I love this age and I hate this age....

Kate is close to 2 1/2 now and while there are a lot of things I love about this age, including her ability to communicate what she thinks and feels, there are a lot of things I hate about this age too, including her ability to communicate what she thinks and feels, LOUDLY, while stomping her feet and throwing toys across the room. Who was it who said that trying to negotiate with a 2 year old was like trying to negotiate with a terrorist? Apparently, someone living with a 2 year old...

At the same time, I'm amazed every day with the funny and insightful things she says. Since I have been very remiss in getting these things into her baby book, I'll write down a few here:

1. Daddy: Kate's devotion to Paul borders on hero worship. While on some level, I'm a bit jealous being the current "second-best" parent, I love that they have such a close relationship. I had work off on Tuesday (gotta love those random Federal holidays) and Kate had school off too, so we spent the day together. When Paul left for work, Kate erupted into sobs and was crying, "I want my Daddy! I want my Daddy!" She calmed down about 2 minutes after he left. Then about 10 minutes later she said "I was crying. I was very,very sad. I wanted my Daddy. But now I'm fine!"

2. Politics: During this year's election cycle, Kate has been very interested in pointing out pictures of Obama and McCain in every TV ad, magazine and newspaper she sees. This week, after several days of pointing out all the magazine covers declaring Obama's victory, she turned to me with a confused look on her face and said "What happened to Me-cain?" :)

In other news, we have gotten rid of the crib and Kate now has a toddler bed. I've posted a few pictures of her in her new bed here. You will see that although we no longer have a crib, we still have a pacifier (although only at night). Some say I should take it away from her - I say that is one battle I am not prepared to fight with my little terrorist :) Hell, if it helps her get to sleep, she can have it until high school if she wants...

Some Early Fall Pictures

A Visit from Grandma

We've had a pretty busy October so far. Grandma Marsiglia came to visit. Kate had a great time and still refers to the guest bedroom as "Grandma's room." She also says that Grandma is currently gone "visiting Papa."

'Nastics

Despite the fact that Kate's gymnastics class always seems to be a bit chaotic to Paul and I, she really seems to like it. As she likes to say "I'm 'cited about 'nastics."

Donuts!

Sunday morning donuts are one of Kate's favorite routines. As you can see from the picture below, she has even perfected the correct way to make sure that Sadie doesn't eat the donut.

I think my child may be a Republican...what have I done????

Kate was eating dinner tonight and the TV was on. An Obama ad came on and she pointed and yelled "It's Obama! It's Obama!" I nodded and told her "Yes, that's Obama. We like Obama, don't we?" To which she replied "No, I like Me-cain."

Some new pictures

Preschool and Guilt

Today is the last day of Kate's 5th week of preschool. While the initial transition was a bit hard (honestly, for me as much as her), I think that she really enjoys school and feels really grown up to say that she goes to "school."

Every day, we get one of those daycare papers they fill out to let you know what they did during the day, what they ate and how many times they went to the bathroom. Anyway, Kate always needs to "read" me her "paper" every day when I pick her up. She'll point to the portion that in fact, says that she had a wet diaper at 10 AM and 3 PM, tried to sit on the potty at 12 PM and pooped once and proudly says "It says right here that I go to school. I sing songs and play with kids and I am happy at my school." This makes me feel happy too, until days like today when she wailed uncontrollably when I dropped her off. Paul is usually the one who drops her off but he had to be at work early so I brought her today and brought her an hour or so earlier than she usually gets there, so maybe that's why she was so upset. Anyway, I felt awful walking away with her screaming. And guilty.

A few weeks ago, one of my co-workers said jokingly that it seemed like my life was ruled by guilt (I must have been saying I felt guilty about something). I'm pretty sure he was joking and I replied that I blamed the problem on my Catholic upbringing (and can I mention the guilt I feel at being a fallen Catholic? Despite the fact that I know rationally that the reason I am a fallen Catholic is that I'm not that keen on Catholicism - or that I want to sleep in on Sunday, the only day when that is possible - you take your pick.) Anyway, I think my co-worker was on to something. I am ruled by guilt. I think maybe all moms are. I feel guilty when I am at work and leave at 3:30 every day when there's still work to be done. Then I feel guilty when I am back on e-mail at home doing that work in the evening when Kate wants to play with me.

One of my biggest wishes for Kate is that she doesn't grow up to be ruled by guilt (I figure she has a fighting chance of this because even though she has half of my anxiety-ridden genes, she is also half Paul).

She said something funny last night that is actually seeming applicable here. I was reheating some macaroni and cheese for her for dinner (see the guilt? it wasn't even fresh macaroni and cheese - it was reheated - in the microwave - probably in one of those BPA-ridden plastic bowls). Anyway, I was putting the bowl in the microwave and I dropped it and macaroni and cheese when everywhere. I must have screamed because I heard Kate yelling from the table "Mama, what happened?" I told her I spilled her dinner and she replied,"Oh, these things happen. You have to just wipe it up." So I guess I could just take my own child's advice that sometimes, things just fall apart and there's nothing that can be done about it but to wipe it up and move on....

I'm Tired

I'm tired. Pretty much all of the time. And if I'm so tired with only one child and one full time job that allows me to have a fairly flexible schedule (I work 7-3:30 so I can pick up Kate from daycare by 4:30 at the latest and most weeks, I can work from home one day a week), I have no idea how I think I can have another child. And yet, we 100% want to have another child and given that we always said we'd like to have kids about 3 years apart, that would mean thinking about getting pregnant again now, or in reality, about 1.5 years ago, considering how not easy it is for us to actually get pregnant...

And I am insanely jealous of my friends who have the option of working part time or even not at all - I'm not even sure if I'd choose that if I had the option, but damn it, I'd like it to be an option. I am also insanely jealous of my friends (and frankly, my brothers too) who have parents who live close by and bring over diapers and clothes and toys for their kids and babysit for free and take them out to dinner. I know in my rational mind that my parents would do that too if we lived near them, but we don't and so in all 100% honesty, I'm jealous. And I'm tired.

And then I wonder, does Kate even notice that Paul and I split our schedules so that she is in daycare the least amount of time possible for having 2 parents who are both working daytime full time jobs or does she really not care and maybe I can stop getting up at 4:15 AM every day to get to the gym before getting to work by 7 AM?

I know this is cranky and whiny, but that's how I feel....

Beach Pictures

Home

Paul, Kate and I spent our vacation this summer at a beach house on Lake Michigan with my family. The house was beautiful, the weather was great, Lake Michigan is gorgeous as always, and it was great to be with family, but I came to the somewhat bittersweet realization that Michigan does not feel like home to me anymore.

I've been in the DC area for 7 years now. The traffic is awful, the cost of living is ridiculous, but the minute we turned onto the Capital Beltway after a 10 hour plus drive home from Michigan, I felt "I'm home." I don't know what to do with that feeling. We've always said we would eventually move back there - after I finished my fellowship, after we had a child, and on and on. I know that Paul would move back in a second if I said I would, which makes this all the more complicated.

For now, I'm home - in the sweltering humidity, smog and 60 minutes to drive 10 miles.

More Transitions

Here are a few pictures of Kate and some of her neighborhood friends from last weekend. We had a going away party for our good friends who are moving to Richmond at the end of the month. That's the huge downside to living in a transient area - people seem to always be leaving...

(I had to throw in the one photo of Kate with the juice box, because of the expression on her face - she looks like somebody spiked her Motts for Tots....)

My Olympian

While I'm not big on watching the Olympics in general, I do love watching women's gymnastics. I was watching the team qualifying round on T.V. Sunday night and Kate seemed spellbound watching the tumbling. She was staring at the screen and then all of a sudden, out of no where, she dashed across the basement with her hands up in the air, threw herself into a somersault and promptly landed right on Sadie. Sadie looked mildly annoyed, but Kate was quite pleased with herself, stood up, threw her arms up in the air again and started clapping. She's been practicing "nastics" every night since. I just signed her up for a toddler gymnastics class for the fall - we'll see how that goes :)

Transitions

Kate will be starting preschool in less than two weeks. I think she will enjoy it, but I know it will be a huge transition for her, because she's been with the same child care provider (who she calls "Ema") since I went back to work. So I'm really worried that the transition is going to be hard for Kate. Here's a few pictures of Kate and "Ema":

More Summer Pictures

Here are a few recent pictures from the block party this past weekend, as well as some other pictures from the pool and hanging out this summer.

Tim and Jill - if you're reading this, you'll see that Kate's wearing the lady bugs pajamas you sent her for her birthday. She is obsessed with them and if I try to put any other pajamas on her (say for instance, when the coveted lady bug ones are in the wash), she looks at me in an accusatory manner and says (in what I swear is a German accent she picked up from her daycare provider :) "Theeesse is not the lady bugs!"

Shake It

I find it a little bit scary that my toddler knows about ITunes. There is a popular song on the radio now, that's both catchy and slightly annoying at the same time. It's called "Shake It" and it's by a band called Metro Station. Kate's heard it in the car a few times and she loves it - she'll start dancing in the car in her carseat and say "I'm dancing in my seat!"

We got in the car a few days ago and she said "I want to hear Shake, Shake!" I told her it wasn't on the radio and she replied without missing a beat "Call Dada, tell him go buy Shake, Shake." So now we have an ITunes copy of the song and must listen to it several times a day and dance...and for those who are wondering, Kate unfortunately inherited my dancing skills, if you know what I mean. Here's a picture of her doing what I like to call "interpretive dance."

Getting Called out at the Block Party

I think one of the most fascinating aspects of having a two-year old is the funny things that she says (and how they really reflect on Paul and I). Take last weeked, for example. We had a block party Saturday night. We got a permit to close off the street and everyone brought grills out and made hamburgers and hotdogs. I asked Kate if she wanted a hamburger and she replied, "Hamburger Helper?," which elicited a laugh from the neighbors. Little do they know that Hamburger Helper is actually one of our fancier meals.....

And reflecting on my obsession with ice cream, we were coming home from going out to eat Sunday night, and as we're driving, Kate yells from the backseat "I want to eat THERE!" I told her,"Kate, we just ate!" and Paul said, "You do realize where she's pointing, right?" And sure enough, we were just passing the Dairy Queen :)

Happy 2nd Birthday!

Kate turned two on Monday, which is hard to believe! We had a small birthday party for her on Saturday with a few friends.

I've attached a few pictures, but still need to figure out how to post on here in a way that will let me caption each photo - I'm a bit computer-challenged, I guess....